No Day is Too Dark

It was a fall day, not too long ago, a day that will never leave my mind. My wife went off for a regular check-up at the doctor's office, expecting nothing incredibly out of the ordinary in her pregnancy. I have to say, I expected nothing, either. What took place that day was initially surreal, followed by a journey to emotionally broken depths I have never gone to before. While I may return to other such days, this day will rank above all of the deepest days of grief. I remember her walking through the doors, deeply in tears, and saying something about the baby not moving. The doctor were deeply concerned, even perplexed. There was no movement, no detectable heartbeat, nothing. I remember going in maybe a month before and seeing that baby moving around, and what a happy day it was. What happened? I drove my wife to the major hospital, a flood of emotions overcoming me. Fear...anger...frustration...even hope that maybe this was just a fluke, it would all be okay. I remember going in, looking at that screen, and seeing my child in the womb, not moving. No heartbeat. The baby was gone. Sadness crept in...and then it pinned me to the ground. Wave upon wave of grief, nothing like I'd ever known before. I remember breaking down in homiletics class the next day when we were asked for prayer requests. I remember leaving after that class and not returning to class for the day. I remember the emotions, and like a stone dropped in water, the waves are largest at the epicenter, and yet even as you move away, you sometimes feel the ripples. You know, in all of that, I never cried a tear of absolute hopelessness. I never got angry at God. I never questioned His sovereign plan--I feel He had prepared us for that. When I think of all of this, I think of the sun or the stars that we behold in the sky. I think about how they shine so bright because of the darkness that they're set upon. And then I think about life, and how God's grace and love shine brightest in our darkest hours. The pain is real, and quite frankly I feel it's best to face it. But a believer doesn't have to face it hopelessly. We can face those days, hard as they may be, with deep, grace-filled, soul-drenching hope, the hope of God. The knowledge that He's doing what's best and has a plan. And so I turn to these verses and say to you, if you're a believer, don't weep as one without hope on your dark days...

17 So when Jesus came, He found that he had already been in the tomb four days.
18 Now Bethany was near Jerusalem, about two miles off;
19 and many of the Jews had come to Martha and Mary, to console them concerning their brother.
20 Martha therefore, when she heard that Jesus was coming, went to meet Him, but Mary stayed at the house.
21 Martha then said to Jesus, "Lord, if You had been here, my brother would not have died.
22 "Even now I know that whatever You ask of God, God will give You."
23 Jesus said to her, "Your brother will rise again."
24 Martha said to Him, "I know that he will rise again in the resurrection on the last day."
25 Jesus said to her, "I am the resurrection and the life; he who believes in Me will live even if he dies,
26 and everyone who lives and believes in Me will never die. Do you believe this?"
27 She said to Him, "Yes, Lord; I have believed that You are the Christ, the Son of God, even He who comes into the world."
28 When she had said this, she went away and called Mary her sister, saying secretly, "The Teacher is here and is calling for you."
29 And when she heard it, she got up quickly and was coming to Him.
30 Now Jesus had not yet come into the village, but was still in the place where Martha met Him.
31 Then the Jews who were with her in the house, and consoling her, when they saw that Mary got up quickly and went out, they followed her, supposing that she was going to the tomb to weep there.
32 Therefore, when Mary came where Jesus was, she saw Him, and fell at His feet, saying to Him, "Lord, if You had been here, my brother would not have died."
33 When Jesus therefore saw her weeping, and the Jews who came with her also weeping, He was deeply moved in spirit and was troubled,
34 and said, "Where have you laid him?" They said to Him, "Lord, come and see."
35 Jesus wept.
36 So the Jews were saying, "See how He loved him!"
37 But some of them said, "Could not this man, who opened the eyes of the blind man, have kept this man also from dying?"
38 So Jesus, again being deeply moved within, came to the tomb. Now it was a cave, and a stone was lying against it.
39 Jesus said, "Remove the stone." Martha, the sister of the deceased, said to Him, "Lord, by this time there will be a stench, for he has been dead four days."
40 Jesus said to her, "Did I not say to you that if you believe, you will see the glory of God?"
41 So they removed the stone. Then Jesus raised His eyes, and said, "Father, I thank You that You have heard Me.
42 "I knew that You always hear Me; but because of the people standing around I said it, so that they may believe that You sent Me."
43 When He had said these things, He cried out with a loud voice, "Lazarus, come forth."